Saturday, January 12, 2008

Obligatory Strike Post

Psych was on last night and I loved it, and all that, but it made me realize something about the strike, and television, and even myself in general- that it is one of three shows that I really love.

And this is disturbing, because I’m the girl who watches EVERYTHING. No, really. I’ve watched almost every show on television. Brothers and Sisters? Watch it. Private Practice? Tape (what? It’s on against Criminal Minds.) Cane? I don’t care that it’s new and it sucks, dammit, I was there.

At the risk of sounding overly dramatic, the strike changed everything. I don’t watch primetime TV anymore, really. At least not in the same obsessive compulsive way I would get upset if I missed an Ugly Betty episode that would happen in the past. Ugly Betty was on Thursday, I think the last new one- and I didn’t watch it. I honestly couldn’t think of a good reason to get invested in a storyline about fake people that weren’t going to be there then next week.

I still watch TV, quite a lot, in fact, but it’s in a whole new way. It’s rarely during primetime, I’ll read or surf the internet instead, I’ll watch crap I never would have dreamed of watching three months ago, because it’s funny and it’s on. But I’m not as into scripted shows anymore.

So, WGA and AMPTP? You’ve lost me. And as someone who has actually planned WORK SCHEDULES around TV viewing? If you’ve lost me, think of the others uckers who have lives that you screwed over. Sucks to be you.

What are the three shows that I really, really miss? Pushing Daisies just missed the cut, if only because I think I’ll sound like a TV slut if I say I love and absolutely could not live without FOUR shows, and anyway it’s new and we’re not as emotionally connected. Psych is one, and I’m so happy that I have it until April for the second half of the season. How I Met Your Mother is the second. I don’t know how to explain how much I love this show- maybe it’s the new Friends, or maybe I’m just a dork. But damn, do I want it back. Boston Legal is the last one, because even though it’s morally bankrupt and stands for everything I don’t, that hour every week it was on? I was TRULY entertained.

I'm sure this will change back as soon as there are new episodes back on, but I don't think it's an entirely bad thing if it finally stops me from watching Grey's Anatomy every week.

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

Brand! New! Shows!

Sooo, much to the chagrin of my professors and probably-long-gone-by-now 4.0, I've been spending the past month nesting with the brand new beautiful TV show babies that the gods of television have been so good as to send me. This can probably explain the homelessness I was sure was awaiting me post-Egyptian civ two months ago. Maybe. Possibly. A little bit.

Of course, not to neglect my older children, I am still hopelessly devoted to and would do anything to protect How I Met Your Mother, Boston Legal (although I don't' like New-Guy-Who-Makes-My-Mom-Feel-Old-Because-He-Was-Young-And-Hot-On-Nightcourt-And-Now-He's-Old-And-Saggy, although we all know that that *is* a requirement for getting any on Boston Legal), and CSI:NY. Sadly, due to my tyrannical working system, I have been forced to put Numb3rs up for adoption because it is on far too late on a Friday night when I am already falling asleep (wow, I suck). Le anyhoodles...

But on to my new babies- CBS has given me Cane and the sadly premature and maybe braindead Big Bang Theory, which doesn't seem to have thought of any jokes beyond "OMG a physicist is in love with a waitress at the Cheesecake Factory! HA!!!"

(I'd just like to let my father know that as we speak, my geology professor is talking about freezing things en masse. I'm thinking of you, Daddy!)

Not that I'm going to stop watching. If I stuck through all 22 episodes of the gutwrenchingly awkward Studio 60, I'll stick with this.

CBS also has Cane, which is far better than Big Bang Theory. Sort of Godfathery, but not really, because they're not Italian, not mafia, and decidedly not looking like Al Pacino circa 1973 (*sigh*). But they're rich, ethnic, scary, and have already killed somebody who got in their way.

I love it.

I'm not so sure I'd leave my company in the hands of a refugee of vaguely ethnic background who married my daughter/sorta his sister (say it with me now..."eww"), but I guess if Obi Wan can give Leia to him (Hey! More incest!) I'd trust him too.

Except the ages bug me. The main couple, Jimmy Smits and Really Pretty Woman, are ostensibly married and she's knocked up ("What if someone hurts her to get to the family! NO!" said CBS writers), but she's like four, and he supposedly fled Cuba during the 1962 revolution (or, a LONG-ASS TIME AGO) when he was already 12.

Rock that cradle, Jimmy.

And they have a son who's joining the army already, so figure at least eighteen years. So she got married to her brother at puberty and started popping out kids. WITH HER BROTHER. *shivers*

Oh, and Daddy's dying and Skeevy-Brother-Whose-Name-Is-Totally-NOT-Fredo wants control of the company. Of course he does.

Over on ABC, I have Private Practice (which sucks as much as Grey's Anatomy and yet I'm just as incapable of not watching) and Pushing Daisies.

Oh. My. Lord. I flippin' *love* this show!!! It's cute and adorable and sweet and I really like the fact that they can't touch each other because it prevents the whole show from jumping the shark as soon as they jump into bed.

Also? Ned is ridiculously adorable.

Even if he's possibly gay. I don't care. Marriage of convenience works for me.

Going to check of Samantha Who? on Monday- missed the pilot but apparently it was awesome.

FOX has a lonely offering, but Back to You is quite funny enough to stand on it's own. They just have to stay away from the whole father/daughter thing too much, because that's getting old.

Patricia Heaton and Kelsey Grammer are freaking hilarious, and NotMiles and NotFrank and NotCorky and NotTed (Yep, I just switched classic shows. That's how cool I am!) are quite funny too.

But Kathleen, you ask (probably breathless), which one is your favorite? We must know what to watch!!!

Well, children, I'll tell you. If you only have time (or if you actually *do* your classwork...pssh) to watch one show this year, please, please, please watch Chuck on NBC.

Because it is, quite simply, my favorite new show, and possibly my favorite show ever (well, if we take HIMYM out of the equation), and YOU ALL SHOULD WATCH.

Really funny people, really funny stories now that we're past the "and then this happened..." stage, and easily taped and watched after HIMYM!!!

Also? Chuck is ridiculously adorable. (Also some gay talk on the IMDB page, but I refuse to believe it.) I find it amusing that they stick a rather good-looking person in ill-fitting clothes and go, "Look, now he's an underdog!!!" Oh, NBC. How simple you are.

I'm not sure, but I think my sister and I may have declared out love for the titular character at her birthday party after having lots of glasses of...apple juice. I think.

It makes me miss Less than Perfect. Did anyone else watch that show? Was it not da bomb??? (Yes, I just used "da bomb". That's how cool I am!!!)

Monday, September 24, 2007

Live-blogging the HIMYM Season Premiere.

6:58- OMG I'M SO EXCITED!!! IT's been four months!!!

6:68:30- Maybe I should get some real friends.

6:58:35- Eh. That's no fun.

6:59- Why won't wheel of fortune end??? This isn't Florida, we have no retirees to watch you, Vanna. Get off my screen

7:00- My nails are too long to type on this pad.

7:01- OMG It's back!!! The mom's unbrella!! I WANT TO MEET THE MOTHER!!! (More than I've ever cared about my own mother...)

7:01:30- BARNEY JUST SAID -DARY!!! YES!!!

7:03- Eww. I don't like Alyson Hannigan's hair. You can't see her eyes. She's very pretty, I don't know why she did this. Did Marshall get blonder? Or darker? Or something.

7:03:30- And Robin's dating Enrique I-want-to-be-your-hero-baby Iglesias. God, I love the theme music.

7:05- Hehe. Ted's breakup beard. Awww, Marshall: "my wife". And all I can think is "the Kournikova mounts the Iglacias". It's unhealthy how much I love this show. I want to be their friends. And I love Barney. I would marry him. I know he's gay. I don't care. I don't think sex is everything.

7:10- Barney: "*Your* vagina!!" Best. Line. Ever.

7:12- What, no, Ted can't get a tattoo. I'm not sure how I'd feel about that. No, stupid tramp-stampy mandy Moore, get away from Ted. NO DON'T GET A TATTOO!!!

7:12:30- *realizes exactly how much damage white-bread raised-in-the-North-Shore mother did to forming subconcious during childhood*

7:15- THIS IS SO GOING ON MY BLOG!!!

7:20- Oh, thank God, he didn't--What? *TED* got a tramp stamp. Gah. Tell me it's a stick on. Please let it be a stick on.

7:21- Commercials.

7:22- Commercials.

7:23- And were back.

7:24- Barney's being funny. And I'm laughing.

7:26- "Last night got weird." God, I love this show. So hard.

OH MY GOD WE DO SEE THE MOM!!! I THOUGHT THEY WERE LYING ABOUT THAT!!! AWW I LOVE THE MOM!!! *ahem* Ewww. Mom is wearing white pants. Gross.

I'm going to go watch The Big Bang Theory and eat. Ciao.

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Monday's Guilty Pleasures

Yes, I realize it's been a month. And yes, I'm sorry to have kept you waiting. And if I had time I'd worry about it. But I don't, so you all can just deal with it yourselves, mmkay??? Moving on...

This post will mainly focus on CSI: Miami and the Bachelor from last night, but I just wanted to run down a couple little things first. To start with, Studio 60 is my new favorite show. I don't know quite why, but I love it. And last night's episode was probably their greatest yet. The old guy made me cry. I know it's pitiful, but he did. Sadly, my tape did not work, but that led me to realize that full episodes are available online, so you no longer have any excuse for not watching. So there. Second, The Class is really hitting it's stride, but they need to tone down the laugh track just a little bit. In the age of Arrested Development, it can get a little bit annoying. And finally, can someone please tell me what's up with Jack and Ann's baby on Without a Trace??? Is she still preggers? Are they still together? I'm so confused!!!

Okay, but main theme today is guilty pleasures, of which I watched many yesterday while eating coconut chocolate chip cookies out of a Hefty Zip-Loc bag (You know those huge ones that show moms on commercials like packing all their kids clothes for camp or something and they stay completely dry? Yeah, well, the children in our family have never really liked sleeping outdoors, playing games, or indeed other children, so we fill ours with cookies.). They were good.

As was the main view of the evening, the too-good-to-not-write-about CSI: Miami. Some woman ended up dead by a golf club that's of course owned by the bitter ex-husband who is, by default, completely innocent. But that's not the important part. She was into this crazy voodoo Catholic shit that involved goat's heads and teeny coffins.

Two things.

1.) I'm sorry Delko, but that stuff is not Catholocism. Although you may be confused, as you seem to think we embrace having sex with strangers when work gets tough, too.
2.) Tell me, where does one get a severed goat's head in Miami (or any city for that matter)???

Delko totally buys into it, and pretty much refuses to have anything to do with the case. Ryan is all, "Pssh. Whatev. There is no curse," until a "dead" body wakes up in the morgue and he screams and runs like a little girl. No, really. He's hopping over stuff and knocking other stuff over. It was freaking hilarious. Then he goes pretty much batshit crazy and automatically accepts everything that comes with the curse.

Oh, and he and Delko have to go invetstigate a graveyard. At night. Alone. With the fog. And they don't want to use their flashlights, for no reason other than it would make way too much sense. And then they find a dead body. Which, of course, has been hatcheted to death. They almost wet their pants. Hehe.

Best part though had absolutely nothing to do with any other storyline except a one-sentence thing about revenge. They discover there's a bomb in a car. Oh no!! And they only have four minutes to difuse it! Well, clearly this will not work, and Horatio must take matters into his own hands!!!

He miraculously drives ot the middle of nowhere (in Miami? In four mintues?) and then saunters (no, really, he saunters!!! I'd be tripping over my own feet trying to get away from there, but he even does the sunglasses thing) away from the car, which immediately explodes in this absolutely massive fireball that should have incinerated him, but doesn't because even fire fears H. And then he goes...

...
...
...

wait for it...

...
...
...

"Burn baby burn."

*dies laughing*

That, quite possibly, made my month.

Final guilty no-I'm-not-watching-that-why-what-have-you-heard??? show was The Bachelor: Rome, which turned out to be not so much a guilty pleasure as a guilty boring hour of self-absorbed not terribly interesting Paris Hilton clones. The only funny part is you get the feeling that they all think they're going to be real princesses. But it made me want to clean my room, which a good TV show should never do.

Monday, September 25, 2006

Massively Huge Premiere Week Wrap-Up

Because I was too busy actually watching all the premieres to write at regular intervals. Sadly, I was not able to take a couple weeks off of school and work just to absorb all the juicy goodnes. Oh well.

On with the shows---

Tuesday:

As you've probably realized, I'm going to do days instead of individual shows, because that would take way longer than I have before math starts.

House was awesome, except euthenasia makes me feel icky. It just does.

Main view of the evening (or rather, the next day, because I had to work), was Boston Legal, which came back in true form with that hands guy being arrested while with a sex therapist because he has this doll that he treats like a wife. Except for the sex part. Which is good, because I was this close to throwing up already. Best part of the night? When Denny introduces Shirley to his custom-made doll, Shirley Schmidtho. I'm still giggling.

Oh, and Michael J. Fox is back and being tried for trying to buy a lung by paying some guy's kid's college tuition.

I'd just like to say that while I'm generally against selling pieces of yourself on the black market, the tuition bill for next semester should be arriving soon, and my father has at least one kidney that he's not using and can be reached through this blog. Let me know. ;)

Also, Parker Posey left, which is good, because she annoyed the hell out of me.

Note: Imladris and Daddy (also has two lungs---give me a call!!!) watched Smith, too, and said that it was extremely mind-numbingly dull and boring. So I'd pass if I were you. Watch Denny Crane instead.

Wednesday:

Gah, so much to watch!!! We began with Bones, which was creepy and excellent, and now definately in my top Five Favorite Shows of All Time. Or At Least On Right Now. Whatever.

Justice, too, was very good. Still completely enthralled with the little epilogue, and I still stop breathing when they return the verdict. I know, I know, that's a little sad. I dont' care. More lesbians. Why are the lesbians on TV always so pretty!?!??!

Criminal Minds was so unbelievably awesome that I stayed up until eleven thirty watching the tape because I could not bear to leave it until the next day. It had been awhile since I'd seen the last episode, but I quicky remembered pretty much everything. I loved it. It was creepy, it was intelligent, it was awesome. One of the best episodes ever. Other Criminal Minds Happy Note: the first season is coming on DVD on November 21-yay!!!!

Of course, the main, seizure-inducing happiness view of the evening was CSI:NY, which I have been waiting for for four (heheh, that's a lot of fours!!!) months. Not that I'm crazy or anything.

Okay. I'm sure the case was good, and I still don't understand how you can have sex while you're careening towards the Hudson, but that wasn't really the part I was paying attention to.

I was more concerned with that British Whore who calls herself a doctor while Stella's eggs are rotting in her blood-stained apartment. (Meanwhile, could CBS pimp Craig Ferguson any more? Seriously. No wonder that's the only show Gary Sinise is ever on.) And then at the end where she and Mac are all, "This is kind of awkward, right?", I was totally hoping that he'd just let her go. But he didn't. He started sucking her face off.

This is completely unacceptable.

Peyton must die.

Thursday:

Lots and lots tonight. Let's see. Oh, the Office!!! It's back, but Jim is at another branch, which is clearly totally not going to work AT ALL. And Pam turned him down, but broke up with Roy, too. Thank goodness.

CSI was back, and really complicated, so I'll just touch on the major points---Nick got yet another awful haircut, Catherine got raped, and Grissom brought Sara a veggie burger, which is CSI for "I'm hitting that."

Shark was also really promising. Apparently, James Woods is quite famous. I've never seen him in anything, but he's very good in this. Glaring legal problems aside, good writing too. I shall keep watching.

Grey's Anatomy came back too, and was good in an unnotable kind of way, except Callie finally admitted that this was "high school with scalpels". Thank you. I've been saying that for eighteen months.

Friday:

Numb3rs!!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!!!! OMGDONSOHOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *ahem* Vewy, vewy good episode, aside from the hotness. I'm kind of wondering how long it is before Amita realizes that she gave up Harvard for a self-involved guy who thinks he's the star of the show. Or before Megan starts to show and the writers either have to give her really big handbags or write in a knocked-up storyline.

Sunday:

Without a Trace. Didn't mention the freaky old preggers girlfriend or the horrific Sam/Martin breakup AT ALL> WTF???

Okay. My hands are tired. Need to go rest before tonight's shows.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Monday's new shows!!! Whee!!!!

Oh so happy. Finally new shows. *is dead with happiness* Just a quick rundown, because there will be more stuff tomorrow (Boston Legal----GAH!!!!!!!!), and I don't want to get a back-log of random shows. And I know you all need to know what to to watch next week, and I wouldn't want to let you down.

The Class~

Okay, I think this might actually be funny. It started off a little bit rocky, but it finished strong. I actually found the part about the guy who was about to kill himself and then wrote down the party hilarious. My sister was mortified, just horrified that they would do something like that, but I was laughing into my chili. I dont' know what that says about me, but I liked it.

The emo girl has been done before, as has the fabulously successful woman married to the gay guy (not that I mind, I love my gays), but that sister was original. Her "happy people" speech??? I'm still laughing about the "I'd kill to find a little note in my diaphragm case!!!" line. Hehehe.

Definately will watch again. You should too.

How I Met Your Mother~

Did not disappoint. I, of course, wanted last season's closer to be a bad dream and have Lily and Marshall wake up and be happy together, but it was not to be. Sad. Anyways, they did it very well, because you felt like the group wasn't broken up (which is hard to do when you lose a cast member), but they also weren't completely bashing Lily.

The ending gave me very conflicted feelings, though, because I was thrilled that Marshall was happy again, and moving on, but in that second when Lily was back at the door I really, REALLY wanted her to go in. *sigh* Why do CBS writers NEVER LISTEN TO ME!?!?!?! Gah.

I'd also like to point out just how inappropriate all these stories are that this guy is telling to his children. Ick.

Two and a Half Men~

Well. Charlie slept with an inordinate amount of women. Alan got dumped and ended up whining at Charlie's house. The maid whined about having to clean up random panties. The kid got in a couple of one-liners (Not my first divorce---hehehe). So pretty much the same as the last two years.

Which is not, as it might sound, a bad thing. Sometimes the best thing comedies can do is just be funny. And this totally was. So happy it's back.

New Adventures of Old Christine~

I am not Julia Louis-Dreyfuss's biggest fan. But I LOVE this show. I think they should give the brother an Emmy just because.

It was quite funny, especially the thing with the teacher (those video cameras??? I'm still laughing), who, incidentally, we saw perform the Christmas story at Disney World a couple of years ago. I do think they need to bring back New Christine, because they kind of lost something when they didn't have that anymore. So she should come back. But other than that, very solid.

CSI: Miami~

*hums the theme song in head* Oh, it was good. And very complicated, so we'll just footnote it. H and Delko are in Brazil, they stick Riaz like a pig, and rush to newly widowed (whee!!!) Yelena and Ray Jr.'s rescue.And Natalia screwed up majorly, not inciting any sympathy on my part, but rather I rejoiced in her mix-ups, because I. Don't. Like. Her. Grrr.

Anyhoodles, I am definately emotionally invovled in this season. Yayness!!!!

Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip---

Okay, honestly, I haven't watched the whole thing yet, but I definately liked what I saw. I will be finishing it tonight, even if I'm late for work. I don't care. This is clearly more important.

I really, really enjoyed it!! I love the characters, I love the writing, and I really love that they are totally ripping off SNL. HAHAHAHAHAHA. Love it.

Friday, September 08, 2006

House, Spy Daddy, and a Big Lez...

...oh the week it has been!!! I'm sure Bones was interesting too, but unfortunately higher education called and I haven't been able to watch the tape yet. However, I am practically out of breath just thinking about the television-related shenanigans (I'm thinking that's not spelled correctly...) that have gone on since Tuesday. Yes, it has been a good week, children, a very good week.

(Meanwhile, ten days until the earliest CSI premieres!!! WHOO!!!!)

Rosie on The View~

Okay, I've been thrilled by this from day one. I never wavered. I've been waiting. For a bunch of reasons. First, when she's not rubbing her much-ballyhooed sexuality in our faces, I love Rosie. She's freakin' hilarious. Second, Barbara Walters has this vision of The View being an empowering women's newsmagazine, and it's totally not, and Rosie totally knows it and will refuse to treat it as such. And finally, I wanted to see how the rest of the girls would deal with her.

And I was surprised! I never really thought she'd end up in a throw-down with Elisabeth, because 1.) Rosie is way more powerful that That Girl Who Was on Survivor and Has a Show on Style Network, and 2.) Elisabeth knows it. But I did not see the totally awkward and painful interactions with Joy coming.

Of course, it all makes sense. Joy was the funny, brash, loud, and liberal one before. Rosie's funnier. Rosie's brasher. Rosie's louder (girl's got lungs!). And, perhaps most importantly, Rosie's a friggen' lesbian. You cannot *get* more liberal than actually being gay yourself. And you can totally tell that Joy is not amused by now having absolutely no function in this show at all anymore.

I love it. *evil grin* I'm taping every morning, just so I don't miss a single minute of the craziness!!!

House~

GAH!!!!!!!! IT'S BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I've waited so long!!!!!!!!! Except I don't like happy House as well. Which is good, because sad, Vicodin-riddled House is coming back soon, as we closed with him writing himself a prescription. Oh, honey, no! You don't need it! *sigh*

And he asked Cameron out. *shivers*

The Unbelievably Ironic Moment of the Night? When Wilson was lecturing House on using people or telling the truth or something. This from the man who could write The Busy Oncologist's Guide to Extramarital Affairs (Chapter 1: Do it with the patients! Saves time!).

Can't wait till next week. Have to work. *pout*

Justice~

Very few shows will make me miss and episode of CSI:NY, even a rerun. But this one will, because it was just that awesome.

The extra-stupid girl from Mean Girls (the "There's a thirty percent chance it's already raining", or "cousins. Then first cousins...") is accused of killing her...well...the guy she was sleeping with. I can't think of anything else to call it. He wasn't really paying her, they certainly weren't going out, and he was married. Anyway, he's dead. And she kinda admits to it, but says it was self defense, which I'm totally thinking it wasn't.

Except that it *was*!!! I wanted her to be guilty. I don't know why. I can't wait until they get off a murderer so you can get those chills like in Boston Legal when Lori helped get off this guy who totally killed this other guy. I love this show.

Except I will never, ever be able to get the mental image of Spy Daddy and Not-Nancy-Grace together out of my mind. *shivers*